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May 21, 2005
Making a Living vs. Making a Life
It appears that I am facing a crossroads in my life. I fell into the field of print advertising via a temp agency in Chicago. Now I'm looking to get promoted and move back home. Problem is, there are many, many more advertising opportunities in Chicago and NYC than there are in L.A., particularly of the print variety. So why not stay here or move to NYC? Well, mi chavo is planning on moving to L.A. to pursue a career in "the biz" (aka the film industry). So, first it's a choice between more career opportunities and living in the same city as the most important person in my life.
Many people think I should put my career's advancement ahead of romantic ideals. That's a very p.c. way of looking at my dilemma. Sure, I want to pursue my career with my heart and soul. And sure, I whole-heartedly believe in the medium, which would add to my ability to sell ad space in it. But I have a feeling if I moved with my Big Corporate Employer to NYC, I'd feel terrible about not trying to get a position on the Editorial side of the divide. My employer publishes a couple of magazines I would *love* to work for as a writer.
But who am I? An unknown blogger who barely gets anyone besides her boyfriend to read her ramblings. It's not like I have clips - or anything else to get me anything better than another glorified secretary position if I tried to make the switch to the Edit side.
Which brings us back to the business side. And am I really a good saleswoman? Can I handle the sales pitches - and the constant pressure to make / exceed last year's numbers? Assuming I can do the job, do I want to?
On the couple front - I really, really, really enjoy my time with my boyfriend. Yeah, our relationship is strong enough to handle time apart, but I'm not sure I am. I mean, sure I can live alone and be dependent only on myself. But I enjoy having mi chavo around when I wake up from a nightmare. I like cuddling with him as we fall asleep. I like making Sunday breakfast and watching the Sunday talk shows with him. I don't want to give any of that up. As much as I believe in the business of print media, I believe in my relationship more. I believe I'm a better person being with mi chavo. I'm not convinced that selling ad pages makes me a better person. Again, I'm not knocking the profession - I'm just not as passionate about it as I am about my relationship.
So I guess that one way or another, I'm going to find a job in L.A. and move back there. Unless my mind forms arguments tomorrow that convince me otherwise.
Posted by cj at May 21, 2005 03:55 PM