June 24, 2009
Realizing How Public the Internet Really Is
This morning, I listened to one of the two free social media webinars that I registered for and advertised to my coworkers. This one was by David Meerman Scott who also spoke at the all-day MarketingProfs Digital Marketing World Conference I attended on April 1.
Five minutes into the webinar, I realized he was giving the same presentation. I tweeted the following:
cminster: listening to @dmscott sm webinar. Same schpiel he gave at MarketingProfs digital marketing conference on April 1. Disappointed #vocus
4 seconds later on my twitter reel, the following popped up:
kevinbehringer @cminster Completely agree. I think I've seen this presentation a few times on a few different webinars
This frightened me, because I had no idea who the guy was (I don't follow him). He found my post because I had used the hashtag #vocus. People attending webinars follow the crowd commentary using these hashtags. I knew about this in theory, but had never seen it in action.
Around 3:30 this afternoon, the following tweet popped up in my account:
dmscott @cminster similar presentation as mprfs sorry
This was so weird to me. Having the presenter of a webinar apologize directly to me? It also startled me, because I'm used to feeling like I'm in a cocoon at my desk, only seeing work, not having random people I've never met talk at me.
I originally sent the above information to my coworkers. I work with an incredible group of talented marketers. Like most of the world, they haven't had time to follow every fad or emerging technology. They're too busy doing their jobs. Plus, we have a sister agency that deals with social media as their core competency.
Right. So I'm sure many people have already experienced how Twitter smashes the walls and creates a sense of intimacy across the interwebs. Lest you think I've found a new way to make best friends with the world, read this WSJ article by Julia Angwin.
Posted by cj at 07:44 PM | Comments (0)
June 21, 2009
Moving Beyond Emotions By Falling into Film
There's nothing that puts life in perspective as beautifully as art.
We remember and learn through narratives in a way that cannot be duplicated by tables, graphs, or rational logic.
And so, the world continues to turn. Despite our best efforts to stop and get off.
I have been the "ideal" Netflix customer for four months. I held onto the same two disks for four months, never watching them, never returning them, and never canceling my membership. Then one day I sent them off in the mail and got The Savages and Lars and The Real Girl in return.
On Friday, I watched Lars and The Real Girl. I'm only sad I didn't see it before attending a random awards ceremony, where the writer of that poignant piece was honored. (Nancy Oliver also wrote for Six Feet Under and writes for True Blood.)
It took a long time, and many splendid reviews, before I could decide that I needed to see a movie about a man and his blow up doll. And I'm glad I did.
Tonight, I saw The Savages. Honestly, I'm not clear what I thought it was. I really had no idea I was consigning myself to watching someone's life go from retirement community to nursing home to death in two hours. It's been awhile since I saw an indie flick, full of freeze frames on empty sets, pacing that feels as slow as real life, and ugly characters who are difficult to like.
I have to say, if I hadn't looked at the Rotten Tomatoes entry, I would never believe anyone calling that film a comedy. Then again, now I know why I put it on my queue to begin with: because I vaguely remembered it as a happy indie. I'm sure many viewers had the same reaction I did; it made me question whether I had spent enough time with my grandma when she was in nursing homes as I could have or should have. It made me remember how lucky I was that Elsie was mostly there towards the end of her life, even if she wasn't the same person she was before her stroke.
[Don't read this is you don't like spoilers], my favorite part of the movie was when the neurotic sister kicked her married lover to the curb. I can understand the pull of a married man, but an ongoing relationship with someone who is not even legally allowed to be completely yours is difficult for me to reconcile in my mind. I cast no judgment on others, but I personally have found some simple rules to live by: if I do anything in my present or future that couldn't be shared with my mom, it's not something I should be doing. Obviously, I can't change the past, but for the present, it's a solid moral line I dare not cross.
In any event, the best thing I can say about the Savages is that it forced me to spend 2 hours not thinking about myself or the Twilight series (which I finished today) or my apathy towards political activism (which I'm sure will dissipate soon), so it served it's purpose well.
Will I ever watch it again? Only if you paid me a lot of money. On the other hand, I could watch Lars and the Real Girl again. In the end, a good movie needs to both speak to an essential truth and be palatable enough for multiple viewings.
Posted by cj at 09:44 PM | Comments (0)
June 20, 2009
the detritus of my mind
These last few weeks have been difficult. I can't place my finger on when it started or why it wont end, but I've been in a funked out place of trauma and incompetence for what seems like forever. Sometimes, it feels like the only person who noticed my shift in moods is my boyfriend. Not that the prevailing winds of my moods should direct the world.
Really, I've been gasping for perspective. I've been trying to remind myself that I'm doing okay: that I'm getting enough done at work, to stop thinking about all the things I could be doing faster if my head was screwed on properly, and to remember that my deliverables have been met.
But just as I started to work my way out of my fear of work, my personal world crashed in around me. I'm shell shocked at the losses. I find it difficult to move beyond profound grief. Facing the cold hard reality of the shifting sands of relationships is petrifying. I thought some things were sacred. I thought blood was a bond that couldn't be broken. I had no idea how tenuous human connections really are.
One thing is for certain: I am determined to stop pushing away the love that is in my life. Though some people choose to live without me, others are very definitely here. And I have to stop fearing the future and embrace the present. There is soul-expanding love in my life and instead of questioning its depth or longevity, I must make myself open to the present presence of this exquisite present.
Posted by cj at 03:26 PM | Comments (0)
May 09, 2009
MS Roundtable from the Nancy Davis Foundation
My mom and I went to the MS Roundtable discussion at the Hyatt Regency Century Plaza today. The following are my notes from the discussion. I did not take short-hand from all speakers.
Introductory Remarks
Nancy Davis: If something is not working for you, you owe it to yourself to read, research and talk to other MS patients.
Dr. Hauser: MS is one of the great mysteries of medicine. Number of MS cases has increased, with the frequency getting greater over the last 100 years. This increase largely, maybe entirely, affects women. There are inherited and environmental factors that lead to this disease. Environmental factors may be more important than inherited ones.
There are 3 new technologies that are helping to fight MS:
- Molecular biology: soon we'll have a blood test to determine whether patients are at risk and how MS will behave in an individual (based on the disease's biomarker).
- Imaging
- Computers and Information Technology: we're using these to help understand what is triggering MS in the environment
Dr. Les Weiner: In California, we're excited about stem cells. There are still federal laws that impede stem cell research. It is a step forward that the new administration understands we need science not only as an engine of the economy, but for our wellbeing. There are currently 12-14 phase 3 trials for new MS medication and some of these are pills. [As opposed to the normal treatment regimen which involves injecting medication through long needles.]
Dr. Kaplan: Thoughts, behavior and feelings are an important aspect of disease management. MS can cause clynical depression because of inflammation affecting the brain. Suicide is the third leading cause of death with MS. Yet, there is hope because depression is the most treatable symptom of MS. The brain can healt itself if you shut off the inflammation. The federal government is funding MS research at 10%, meaning that 9 out of 10 research grant requests are denied. This is why the Nancy Davis Foundation and other private funding sources are so desperately needed.
Dr. Howard Weiner: We're conducting a national history study, following 1,000 patients to find out why some patients do well and why some patients don't do well. We're looking for the signatures of individual patient. There is a potential for blood tests for what stage you're at and whether you'll enter the progressive stage. Five oral therapies are in stage 3 trials. We're trying to develop non-toxic oral therapies. And there is a very good chance for a happy, fulfilling life with MS.
Dr. Waubant, pediatric MS specialist: The youngest patient had symptions at 1.5 years old. We're working to understand better why some patients develop symptoms younger, maybe environmental and this will help understanding MS in general.
Dr. Bourdette: We're working to understand why nerve factors die in progressive MS. We believe there is an energy failure in the never fibers: mitochondria become non-functioning. Our particular target is to use MRI to measure the amount of ATP in brains of people with MS compared to healthy brains.
Answering Questions from the Audience
Will stem cells help create a new generation of medicine for MS?
Dr. Les Weiner: My answer is yes, with no real data to support my answer. This is a hostile environment for stem cells to enter. It is a promising field, but a difficult area to be certain about. We have to be slow in developing trials because you don't want to cause cancer. Brain tumors are a potential side effect of stems cells. We're optimistic that we'll be able to make stem cells from skin rather than embryonic origin. We have to go slowly in developing stem cell therapy because of the need for safety precautions.
Is a cure just around the corner?
Dr. Howard Weiner: There are three definitions of curing:
- Halt the progression of the disease. Treatments currently allow many people to live a normal life. Not everyone, but all of us have patients who are healthy. It is important to treat MS and treat it early, at the first signs of disease.
- Rebuild the nervous system: treat people so they get better. Rebuilding myelin sheath. This is the next frontier.
- Did scientists find a cure for polio? No, we figured out a way to prevent polio rather than curing it. We have programs now trying to prevent MS. We're using blood tests to identify kids at risk to try to treat them so that they never come down with MS.
How do you deal with family members who are over-bearing in their desire to help you with your MS?
Families mean well, but are more frightened than you are. Educate yourself and educate your family and they'll get sick of learning about it.
How do you feel about mega doses of Vitamin D, e.g. 50,000 IUD?
Low serum vitamin D levels increase the risk of getting MS. Most people don't need more than 1,000-2,000 IUD/day. Vitamin D turns down the activity of the immune system.
Nancy Davis: I read, talk, and educate myself about MS. Embracing it, understanding what to do. Live every single day to its fullest. Don't put something off that you can do today. I have MS, but MS doesn't have me.
Dr. Waubant: pregnancy is safe and decreases the risk of progression of the disease. Knowing this taught us the role of hormones in regulating the disease. Up to three months after delivery, there is an increased possibility of symptoms. Breast feeding may decrease the risk of exacerbation.
Dr. Kaplan: Reviewing blood samples of depressed patients, their white blood cells were twice as aggressive as normal rates. Therefore, its important to treat depression to ensure that white blood cells stay at normal levels. A number of studies are being done to determine what drugs protect neurons. SSRIs and lithium (anti-depressants) stimulate neuron production. There are medications that worsen moods: e.g. steroids can cause moods to up or down. It's important to treat those mood swings, either with talk therapy, medication, or a combination of the two.
Dr. Howard Weiner: Optic neuritis is vision loss due to inflammation of the optic nerve. Can be seen in the retina, therefore inflammation is happening where there's no myelin. This may show that MS attacks substances in the brain other than myelin. We are researching a biomarker to determine whether people with optic neuritis will go on to have MS within the next year.
Dr. Waubant: In the months before becoming pregnant, you should stop taking MS medication. In children after age 11 or 12, symptoms are the same as in adults. In younger children, there are other symptoms, including difficulty thinking, drowsiness, and milder symptoms that are often ignored.
MS survivors: Several have used homeopathic doctors to treat the symptoms of MS. Restrictive diets and visual healing have also helped. It is proven that a low fat diet is an anti-inflammatory diet. Fish oil has anti-inflammatory effects. Currently, they are initiating trial of a vegetarian diet as a way of treating MS. De-stressing your life is the best thing you can do.
Nerves are activated through excercise. You need to protect and use your nerves. Even people who have difficulty walking. Excercise causes neurogenesis and is an anti-depressant. It is crucial to keep your wiring active and excercise is good for your brain.
Symptoms of lime disease and MS seem similar. Are they connected?
They are not related. There is no direct connection. But it should be ruled out during diagnosis, because it can imitate MS.
Sometimes, there is a connection between MS and other auto-immune diseases. Psoriasis and thyroid disease can track with MS. Children of people with MS have an extremely low risk of getting the disease.
The earlier the treatment of MS the better. When you're stable, you should have an MRI once a year. When you're changing medication, you should have an MRI once every 3-6 months.
Of all the medication out there, there is a drug for rheumatoid arthritis that can trigger MS. No other drugs have been shown to trigger MS.
Posted by cj at 04:28 PM | Comments (0)
May 07, 2009
The Bridge: Boldly Bursting Ear Drums
Just came back from seeing "Star Trek." While the movie is brilliant and I hope everyone sees it, the experience was worse than sub-standard.
It started with the commercials coming on twice as loud as you'd expect any theatre sound. My friend complained twice and was twice told they couldn't possibly change the sound level, but don't worry the movie would not be as loud.
I couldn't tell you what the 30 pre-movie commercials were about, because my mind could only focus on the loss of hearing being caused by the insane volume.
The movie was at a nominally better sound level, but only nominally. It was as if The Bridge at Howard Hughes Center was trying to recreate Star Tours (the shaking seat Star Wars Disneyland ride) by jostling me from the inside out.
We stayed until the end of the credits (sorry, nothing happens) and on our way out, complained again to the children who had no purpose but to block the entrance / exit to the theater. This time, they decided to respond to our backs "you should stay home in your living room." What fabulous customer service! This for an over-priced small theater (aka "director's screening").
The woman at the customer service desk claimed the sound level on the movie was mandated by its distributor. Yeah, maybe they mandated that you make your Imax screenings at that sound level, but what movie producer in his right mind wants to ruin the hearing of his audience? And further, it ain't like the distributor is in your audience -- if your paying customers complain about something, you either fix the problem or you lose the customer. It's that simple. Between the obnoxious "service" and the stale popcorn, there is no way I'll be walking back into The Bridge anytime soon.
Check out Nimoy's appearance on the Today Show. (RT @AnnCurry Would not blame Leonard Nimoy if he asked for a restraining order restricting me to another another galaxy after this.)
Posted by cj at 10:10 PM | Comments (0)
April 27, 2009
Mad Men: The Academy Forum
Tonight, I went to a forum featuring the cast and creator of Mad Men at the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences. They started the evening with a clip reel (not bad) and then showed us the entire final ep of season 2. Can I just say I did not trek all the way to NoHo on a school night to watch t.v.?
The moderator had too much Jeffrey Lyons gushing and not enough substantive questions. Seeing the actors was a real treat. January Jones, Betty Draper, is super, super skinny. Jon Hamm is as handsome in person as he is on screen (I was so nervous, I took shaky camera pics of him and Chung). Christina Hendricks, the red-head, has poise for days, curves that never end, and a surprisingly skinny face.
I don't feel like I learned anything. Except that the reason there was a strong Catholic story line through season 2 was because Matthew Weiner's rabbi complained that none of the characters had a connection to G-d after season 1. Also, while the actors have an intense interest in the period, they are reticent to predict anything about their characters and have a lot of trust in the writers. This makes sense since the writers research the minutae of the time (sometimes to the detriment of the show's pacing).
Nevertheless, it was fun to see the cast in person. They're shorter than I expected. Vincent Kartheiser has a weird goofball need for attention, but I was able to genuinely shock him when I thanked him for bringing my life to the screen (really, on more than one level. I do work in account in an advertising firm and well...we'll leave it at that).
Posted by cj at 10:49 PM | Comments (0)
April 09, 2009
Scatalogical Budgets
Consumer Reports agrees: Costco toilet paper is a great buy. A family of 3 could save $130 every year by using it.
Posted by cj at 06:07 AM | Comments (0)
March 28, 2009
Being an MSM Writer
I'm attending an interesting round table on writing for the MSM at the Women, Action, and the Media conference.
I once worked with the creator of the NYT Style section and now I'm hearing from a former editor of the same. And I have to admit, it's often the first section I read in my Sunday print subscription.
Check out some live blogging about it at the WILPF blog.
Posted by cj at 09:22 AM | Comments (0)
March 27, 2009
Shaq: a real Twitter
I absolutely love this quote:
"It's 140 characters. It's so few characters. If you need a ghostwriter for that, I feel sorry for you."
It's the best part of this NYT article on Twittering. I know eventually I need to sign up to follow someone's Tweets, but honestly I still feel like it is the world's biggest waste of time.
Posted by cj at 12:42 PM | Comments (0)
February 22, 2009
Vicky Cristina Barcelona
I have often denounced Woody Allen and most male film-makers for being completely incapable of creating 3-D women. Until today, I assumed their inability to see through women's eyes was sheer laziness with a dash of misogyny. But now, I think it may be a deeper problem than that; I think it might truly be difficult for men to understand women.
I never believed that before because I've always had close relationships with men. I assumed the majority of my friends were female because of circumstances: going to a women's college, being involved in a women's peace organization. But today I've come to appreciate a simple truth: women's complexity is quite difficult for men to understand or follow.
So, though I still have great problems with the vast majority of Allen's films, I do appreciate his attempt at describing female desire in Vicky Cristina Barcelona. The characters weren't completely believable, and I do hate how intense female charisma always equals off the edge crazy to men...but then, I do have to admit there is truth in that statement.
It's not the best Allen flick. Penelope Cruz doesn't have enough lines to deserve the Oscar she may get tonight. And besides, I'm really tired of the fact that all the female Oscars go to crazy parts or historical roles, whereas male actors are honored for a more widely ranging field of roles.
I'm also not clear why I thought the movie would be sexier than it was. Why did I listen to the marketing rather than use my head and remember what sex is like in an Allen film? Oh well. At least I experienced plenty of Bardem screen time. Must rent Entre Las Piernas again...
Rotten Tomatoes Top Critics reviews
Kenneth Turan's review in the LAT
Richard Corliss in Time:
Well, why shouldn't Allen have a crush on Juan Antonio? For one thing, he dreamed the character up; for another, Bardem doesn't have to work hard to radiate the sensitive machismo of a man who doesn't use women so much as he allows them to briefly fulfill their dreams in him. Visually, too, the movie is in love with Barcelona, its gnarled Gaudi buildings, and with the countryside of Ovieto, a hundred shades of glorious earth tones. (The cinematographer is Javier Aguirresarobe, who has shot films directed by Pedro Almodovar, Victor Erice and Alejandro Amenabar.)
Andrew O'Hehir in Salon
When Bardem and Cruz are in the film together, ripping into their Latin-lover caricatures with gusto, they hijack it almost completely away from the enervated Yankettes. (Allen doesn't speak Spanish, and uncharacteristically allowed Bardem and Cruz to freelance extensively on the set.)
Ebert's review (which I haven't finished reading because I must start getting ready for an Oscar party...)
Posted by cj at 12:13 PM | Comments (0)
January 25, 2009
Gran Torino
While I appreciate the cadence of Eastwood's late career films, I haven't made it a priority to see one since Million Dollar Baby. My friend chose this film, and I'm glad I saw it.
While the dialogue wasn't always realistic, it rang true to me. Racial epithets fly from people's mouths more often than sunny platitudes, especially men of my father's generation.
I was particularly happy to see a dramatization of the deep similarities between Korean War vets and first generation immigrants - after all, it's been a few generations since Americans as a whole needed true grit to get through life. While Kowalksi's family seemed at times like caricatures of overfed suburbanites, they were people I recognized clearly: upper middle class white folks, trying desperately to pretend they know nothing about being poor and clueless children who truly think they deserve every earthly possession of their elders.
I haven't seen any Dirty Harry movies, so I can't tell you how well this movie turned Clint's iconic character inside out. I know there was a black and white quality to the ending, one that could have left me as cynical as Ty Burr. But personally, I didn't think it was "the last temptation of Clint." Unlike Seven Pounds, I appreciated the ending of Gran Torino. It surprised me, but made sense. Though I liked Springsteen's song concluding The Wrestler more than I liked Eastwood's gravelly singing to credits in GT, this is a movie I could watch again. And I think it's an important bridge between mid-century American values and 21st century American reality.
Roger Ebert liked it too
77% of critics on Rotten Tomatoes agree with me
Posted by cj at 08:14 PM | Comments (0)
January 23, 2009
The Precipice of Change
Yeah, it's a time of political change and tepid hope for a magical lifting of the recession we reaped from our rapacious appetite for resources. I haven't thought too deeply about our times as an individual, because I was too focused on getting WILPF's priorities edited and published and advertised [e-newsletter not currently available online]. Right, so enough of that.
The precipice I'm most interested in is extremely personal. In November, 2006 I found a career that keeps me interested in going to work every day. In December, 2006 I began battling thyroid cancer. I've been relatively healthy for over a year, but right now, in the next month, is when I'm actually going to begin my post-thyca life.
By moving out of the Valley, I'll return to the life I knew before cancer: independent and full of possibility. I've put a major restriction on my apartment hunting by focusing on locations that will accept dogs. I've been yearning for a lap dog since that awful day I was sitting in my cubicle and got the call that confirmed I had papillary carcinoma. There are other companions I'd like to have on this journey, but I can't hold my breath waiting for those pieces of the puzzle to fall in place.
Time to focus on finding my next home.
Posted by cj at 10:00 PM | Comments (0)
December 21, 2008
Seven Pounds
Last night I decided to go to the movies. Since I drove to the West Side to do errands, I ended up at the Century City mall. Note to self: that AMC is overpriced ($12 a ticket! Junior Mints that are pre-melted and stuck to the box!) and has a crappy selection of films. I begrudgingly bought a ticket to Seven Pounds; really wasn't planning on seeing the film but felt like less of a loser taking myself to a random movie I assumed wasn't depressing rather than spending the night alone at home.
My review was going to be simple: don't go to this movie alone. But after reading some highly amusing reviews, I've altered my review: don't go to this movie.
I thought it was just me and my knowledge of the IRS that got in the way of me being deeply immersed in the film. But no. It was the film that got in the way. I would like to see Rosario Dawson and Will Smith together in another movie. As soon as Smith gets over his Jesus fixation.
A.O. Scott's review in the NYT. (Thanks for the Jesus tip.)
Wesley Morris' review in the Boston Globe, featuring the amusing observation:
How, if Ben is so suicidally depressed, does he still get his hair to have that perfect S-Curl sheen? (That's not easy to do when you want to live.)
Amy Biancolli in the Houston Chronicle makes the important point that the final scene of the movie is super creepy.
Posted by cj at 01:53 PM | Comments (0)
December 14, 2008
Cadillac Records
It says something about the caliber of the singing that I thought the actors in Cadillac Records were lip-syncing to original recordings. Though I give them credit for doing a fine job in the pipes department, someone either at the theatre or in the editing room did a terrible job syncing their lips to the audio track.
The individual performances were engaging and entertaining. Eamonn Walker scared me with his Howlin' Wolf glares; Jeffrey Wright frustrated me with his acquiescent Muddy Waters; I followed Columbus Short down Little Walter's spiraling addiction, and Beyonce was convincing as Etta James (though in fairness I've never seen the real James).
But the movie lacked an emotional core. That's understandable, since emotional resonance rests on truthfulness and re-writing the history of brothers' business acumen into a One White Man Show leaves little room to suck a viewer into the beating heart of a story.
My feeling about the movie is best described as follows:
[W]e're never given much insight into who Chess really is, what makes him tick or why we should care about him. --Michael O'Sullivan, WaPo
The film glosses over the blatant exploitation of black talent by Jews (at the time deemed second-class whites by US cultural norms), but since it has So Much History To Tell (or rewrite), I can't fault it for being kind to my people.
My memory is that Muley Willis and his uneasy relationship with his estranged father in Adam Langer's Crossing California gives better insight into Chicago's ethnic divisions and connections than this film.
Nevertheless, Cadillac Records is enjoyable and worth the ticket price.
Rotten Tomatoes Top Critic's round-up
"Got Their Musical Mojo Working, by A.O. Scott in the NYT
Ebert's review
Peter Travers' mini-review in Rolling Stone
"Muddying the waters," by Ty Bur in the Boston Globe
Posted by cj at 03:31 PM | Comments (0)
December 13, 2008
A Good Year....yes my life has gotten that boring
In my defense, I had an intense week with very little sleep, too much activism, and staying late at work every night. That's really all I've got to explain why I watched A Good Year last night / this morning. (Yes, I fell asleep watching it; yes I understood it was an awful movie before deciding to watch the second half this morning.)
Here's an accurate description of the film's primary problem:
Crowe never connects with this character, and his internal journey from putz to prince never attains any emotional resonance. --Gary Thompson, Philadelphia Daily News via Rotten TomatoesI felt like he was trying harder to maintain his London accent than he was trying to connect with the character. Still, I have to give this to the film: it's rare to watch a RomCom from the male perspective, with long camera views peaking up a woman's skirt and ogling a married woman dancing. It comforts me to see these touches of realism in a film genre known more for its gauzy faux reality of beautiful, skinny people having trouble finding a date.
While I never need to see the movie again, it was more entertaining than watching a Grey's Anatomy rerun. So there's that, right?
Posted by cj at 01:13 PM | Comments (0)